Talkin' Differences in Sexes

So while I have been busy writing, I had nothing significant I wanted to share within this site for a while... tonight is finally here. In the great tradition of Woody Guthrie, I finally wrote a talkin' song.... now most who know my voice are probably saying, "Thank God"... but really this again like anything takes inspiration. Mine came from a simple thing like the differences in women's hair, and how some women at work will change the way come to work every other day. Up, down, curly, straight, wet or dry... and gracious sometimes that's the same person. It got me thinking about the differences between men and women... so after great research, I throw this piece into the mix. 

 Now it does use current cultural references which date it, and I don't recommend that for a song like this; of course I think that Rush and McCain's crazy "The Google" will live in cultural literacy for awhile. Some day I will record a YouTube of this... until then enjoy. 

 Ok folks, it’s plain to see, that I’m talkin’ differences ‘tween you and me. 

Or should I say them and us, you know vagina versus the old penis. 

I’ve been around a time or two, enough to see a closet full of shoes

 But when I went to write ‘em down, I was worried to be shipped out of town. 

You know Rush Limbaugh style, angry, confused, blabbering all the while. 

 Now this shouldn’t be an editorial bit, so I used THE google and McCained it. 

You know in this digital age, you just search and copy some body else’s page. 

So armed with a laptop and coffee, I got my windows to look at me. 

Point and click info by the ton, ohhhh better put the adult filters on. 

Just incase you try this at home, don’t try that with thing with foam. 

 Back to work and just like I thought, lists and lists of haves and have nots. 

Some pretty scientific stuff, when I thought camo versus pink fluff. 

There’s left brain / right brain, and why women explain and explain 

There’s x y, mars and venus, and oh yeah then right back to the penis 

So who here before the age nine, played you show me your I’ll show you mine? 

 Mumble… after age nine… hmmm look me up sometime…. 

 Hair style is difference I relate, hell mine been the same since 8. 

Yes all that time to get ready, and you just better notice Freddy. 

She’s worked hard at getting it just right, even if it’s a bun pulled tight. 

Darlin you look good tonight, no, no really I meant outta sight. 

Sure the game is on, but I looked at you really, really, really.. hey he’s gone. 

So if I make it through this song, and married to my favorite one. 

It just means that difference attract, and then find a way to react. 

Most women are saints you know, and successful guys will surely show 

Their pride and joy that brings them dinner, after they said she looks thinner 

Yes indeed, I meant every word, thanks for the dinner hun. 

 By Dave Schipper © 2009 Rose Riversongs Many thanks to Woody Guthrie and Charlie Maguire for inspiration. Funny I went back to this song recently and thought it was too wordy and needed to update some references. I'm planning on sharing this song at an upcoming Songwriter Swap that is going to be on funny songs. 

 Talkin’ Sexes 

Ok folks, it’s plain to see, that I’m talkin’ differences ‘tween you and me. 

Or should I say them and us, you know vagina versus the old penis. 

I’ve been around a time or two, enough to see a closet full of shoes 

But when I went to write ‘em down, I was worried to be shipped out of town. 

You know all Fox News style, angry, confused, blabbering all the while. 

Now this shouldn’t be an editorial bit, so I used THE google and researched it. 

You know in this digital age, you just copy some body else’s page. 

So armed with a laptop and coffee, I got my windows to look at me. 

Point and click info by the ton, ohhhh better put the adult filters on. 

Just incase you try this at home, don’t try that with thing with foam. 

Now just like I thought, lists and lists of haves and have nots. 

Some pretty scientific stuff, just when I thought camo to pink stuff. 

There’s left brain / right brain, and why women explain and explain 

There’s x y, mars and venus, and oh yeah then right back to the penis 

So who here before the age nine, played you show me yours I’ll show you mine? 

Mumble… after age 18… hmmm look me up sometime…. 

Hair style is one I can relate, hell mine been the same since 8. 

All that time to get ready, and you just better notice Freddy. 

She’s worked hard at getting it just right, even if it’s a bun pulled tight. 

Darlin you look good tonight, no, no really I meant outta sight. 

Sure the game is on, but I looked at you really, really, really.. hey he’s gone.??? 

So if I make it through this song, and married to my favorite one. 

It just means that difference attract, and then find a way to react. 

Women are saints you know, and smart guys will surely show 

That smile when she brings them dinner, after he said she looks thinner 

Yes indeed, I meant every word, I swear on this cheese curd. 

 By Dave Schipper © 2009 Rose Riversongs, Updated 2023 Many thanks to Woody Guthrie and Charlie Maguire for inspiration.